By Jaz McKay

It’s story time boys and girls and today our story is called, “Let’s Go Shopping in San Francisco……”

Once upon a time, the “All New & Improved Democratic Socialist Party of America” decided to blame the latest craze of shoplifting, which was sweeping cities like San Francisco, on starving people who “either need to shoplift some bread or go hungry.”

Apparently since the Ascension of Saint George of Fentanyl, those poor, poor, pitiful poor people who worship at his alter had been visiting the Neiman Marcus store in the Golden Gate City searching for a few morsels of bread to feed their starving families. However, in as much as Neiman Marcus didn’t sell bread, they had to settle for some super expensive handbags instead……

Unfortunately for the followers of Saint Floyd, if you take more than $950 at a time, shoplifting can still lead to arrest even in California.

And unfortunately for store owners if you call the police after catching a shoplifter in the act, you open yourself up to a bunch of nasty lawsuits.

“Several retailers in the state have been sued by people caught shoplifting who claimed to be victims of racial profiling. Businesses understandably fear bad publicity and hefty payouts that may exceed their losses from the theft.”

So, a few retailers tried a more creative approach to dealing with the criminals and tried to offer them a little “life lesson” in why stealing is wrong. Again, unfortunately for them the city attorney, Dennis Herrera, clamped down on that practice saying it amounted to extortion and false imprisonment and he sued.

“Some large retailers including Goodwill, Walmart and Bloomingdale’s sought to punish shoplifters by requiring them to take a class in “life skills” to avoid a criminal complaint. The San Francisco city attorney then sued the educational company that provided the classes for extortion and false imprisonment.”

“In California, in short, trying to protect one’s property can be a criminal offense. Looters, on the other hand, typically go free thanks to a 2014 referendum that turned theft of property valued at less than $950 into a misdemeanor. Police stopped apprehending shoplifters because it wasn’t worth their time as thieves were released.”

So, in closing let’s ponder the moral to our story boys and girls: When you allow the “All New & Improved Democratic Socialist Party of America” to apply the Broken Windows policy in reverse, and allow a little crime, in the end you’ll always get a lot more crime in return.

The End

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